Mickey is a Self-Centered Shirk-off

[Ed. Note: this post comes from one of our esteemed contributors, Jon (the non-asian Jon).]

Well, as the week of parentless freedom comes to a close, I bring myself to reflect on the many ways in which my brother has been an uber-tool. First of all, the man buys an eighth (of "rosemary jane"), of which I contributed, and then neglects to give me even the smallest nug in the bag. He criticizes my smoking, then smokes cigarettes with me after a night of drinking with the Boyd. He fails to take any sort of responsibity, yet demands that I respect his seniority. In an attempt to please our parents, he says "let's leave the place cleaner than it was when mom and dad left," however, he leaves on an abode to our old summer camp, without even taking care of the menial task of washing his own fucking dishes. He made me late for work one day because he couldn't gather the common sense to bring his wallet with him. And the final shirking of responsibility comes as he neglects to pick up my parents from the airport, leaving me holding the bag. This is the same kid who spends tons of money on respectable looking clothes yet isn't able to secure a paying job for the summer, despite his acceptance at a notable business school. My only consolation from the whole ordeal (after spending over an hour cleaning his fucking pots and pans) is the listen to my parents yell at him for an hour, as they too have grown tired of his egotistic antics, lavish spending habits without employment, inability to finish any of the projects around the house that he starts, not to mention his abhorrid habit of singing intentionally off-key, and then not stopping even after four to four-hundred pleas to do so. In short: Fuck Mickey.